R.I.P. Nicole Eggert

1224 words

(it's a memorial, give me a break)

 

Sadly, one of our chickens, Nicole Eggert, is no longer with us. I'm not 100% certain when she was "removed" from the flock, but I can tell you she's gone. She was the leader of the pack, or at least thought she was and really, that's all that matters. I'm already working on a memorial video with all the footage I've taken with her over the year-ish... stay tuned...you'll be glad you did.

 

When we decided a few years ago that we wanted chickens, it started as a novelty in my mind. I thought, hey us, we're in Montana, we've got some land here, let's see if we can raise chickens. What the hell, why not, right? Bella wasn't quite sure about it, but now she's ok with them and so are we. They will actually chase after her if she's got a bone or a treat they think they might want. They're like a little gang of egg laying bullies.

 

That's a picture our very first egg ever!!! I felt like a proud chicken parent, except we ate our baby. What? I'm so happy that Jenn took this photo, I wasn't going to. Looking at that photo I can tell you it was one of our leghorns because it's a white shell. They are awesome, as long as the little chicken hawk leaves them alone. For anyone born after 1980 go see this now for some historical reference. I say, I say...

 

We've since learned that the chickens are givers. They will produce eggs even if we don't want or need them. At one point we had 56 eggs in our kitchen. That prompted us to start selling them to our friends to offset the cost of their feed and whatnot. It's a total win/win and I'm no longer left feeling like I've got to make deviled eggs every 3 days. My heart thanks me.

 

For some chicken reason they tend to lay eggs in the same nest. I've got 10 boxes in their coop, but each and every time I go to collect, they are always, without fail, in 2 of the nests. I guess they choose the luxury box with a view of the door? Like I said, it's chicken reasoning, you can't rationalize. By the way, total legit picture, they laid them this way, and usually do.

 

 
We expected eggs, that was the whole point. What we didn't expect was the entertainment value of these girls. I'd say dollar for dollar, I've never been so pleased from an investment, ever, and I have the internets, so, yeah. Not only do they provide us and our friends with food and keep the bug population well in check around the house, but we will spend hours outside watching and listening to them scavenge around the yard in the warmer months. I know, hours sounds like a long time, but you probably have spent hours driving in traffic to see a crappy movie you paid for then had to drive home in traffic and complain about it on your blog. It's just a different way of spending our time. Get off my lawn.

 

Chickens are resilient as can be. In the winter, they come out and still scratch in the snow to find anything they consider edible in the frozen grass. I give them food every other day and keep a heated water bowl out for them too. They still lay eggs for us even in the winter months. Gotta love that. Most things would just quit, like most birds do. They totally quit for the winter and fly south where it's warmer. Quitters.

 

When Roscoe P Coltrane was introduced to the chickens I knew immediately he was going to be ok with them. He watched them for hours, yes hours (while my wife and I drove in traffic to see a movie we didn't like and... just kidding, but you see how hours can slip by). He only ran once, and that was directly away from the flock of cackling flapping egg laying bullies. He had gotten to close to their prized bail of straw.

 

Circle of life. When we had our niece and nephew visit from California they were enamored with the girls. They couldn't understand how the whole thing worked at first. They had only seen eggs come from the refrigerated section of the store and they had only seen a real chicken on their plate, not with feathers, not with bugs from the yard in their beak. It was really great to show them this little slice of life, if you will, and since then, they have asked about the girls whenever we get patched through by the local operator on the switchboard in town. No, that's not true, but had you thinking about it, didn't I? (By the way, from left to right She-ra, Attila The Hen, and Dotty)

 

We've got lots of different predators out here, but the one I think might have absconded with Nicole Eggert is the red tailed hawk. In the spring they hover the landscape and take snakes, rodents, bunnies, and other small animals, like chickens.

 

They usually have chicks by now and they eat ALLOT. I setup my camera a couple years ago to spy on this nest. I left the camera there for an entire day and was very impressed to see how much these little fuzzballs ate. One of them took down most of the snake you see in the shot there. The parents are pretty much hunting from sun up to sun down.

 

Chickens aren't just for dinner. I think they each have a personality and are actually quite pretty. The leghorns are the most outgoing. I handle them on a regular basis and they will actually sit on my arm like a parrot if I let them. I'm just worried about them pecking my eyes out.

 

This is Little Jerry Seinfeld, he's a white crested black polish. We set out to only have hens, but he's a rooster. So he's gone. Let's just leave it at that.

 

Shaking off after a nice dirt bath, which is very different from a dirt nap. They have little dug out holes all over the yard that they roll in. It kinda looks like a stuffed animal having a seizure on the lawn, but upon further inspection, it's just a chicken.

 

This is one of the leghorns hunting up some bugs one summer evening. The light was just right and I happened to be laying in the yard with my camera. It's just something I do sometimes, don't judge me.

 

 

Guess what?

Chicken butt.

 

I just get all warm inside when I see my wife come in with an apron full of eggs.  She actually bought that apron at a thrift store for this egg gathering purpose. I love that about her. There's this feeling of complete and utter satisfaction. If you ever get the chance to use some real fresh backyard chicken eggs jump all over it. Your palette will thank you.

 

So, Nicole Eggert, if you're reading this because you thought you were dead, rest assured you're not. I loved you in Charles In Charge, but I loved you more in Baywatch. Keep rocking the little kitty and the rainbow short sleeve sweaters girl, you've earned it. Peace.

 

Comments

[Wendy]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your Nicole. I lost all SEVEN of my hens just over a month ago to something (raccoon perhaps?). I can't wait to get a new flock.

I literally laughed out loud at your blog. You have such a great way with words. I can't decide if I'm laughing harder at the gang of flapping egg laying bullies, or stuffed animal having a seizure. It's so true!

[GracieMD]

"Chicken butt" made me laugh out loud. Great piece.

[Goldie]

My favorite part of this post is "Guess what? Chicken Butt!" One of my girls is always asking "Guess what?" and I will randomly break out the "Chicken Butt!" much to her chagrin.

Also, RIP Nicole

[Jason]

It would be FAIL if I did not point out the joy of chikkinz:

http://momentofellis.tumblr.com/post/3504825011/i-has-chikkinz-freakangels-episode-54-art-by

[Gracie]

I just finished reading your entire blog, archives and all. A friend forwarded me a link to this story and I enjoyed it so much, and was absolutely in love with your photohraphy, so now two hours later (ok I was also watching TV), I'm sitting here wishing you'd started sooner so there'd be more to read.

[Ishy]

Chickens are are so underrated when it comes to personality. My first pet was a Rhode Island Red named Sweetpea and she loved to ride around on my mother's shoulder. I'm glad you have these girls in your life!

[Janice]

Thanks for a great post, I really enjoyed it. As a fellow chicken owner, I can identify with everything you talk about especially not realizing how entertaining the ladies are. You're right, hours can slip by...

[Sarah Sic]

Thank you so much for this post. We just lost a girl (my favorite) and this post about the joys of chicken raising helped me remember why I love having chickens so much. R.I.P. Nicole Eggert.

[Aunt Dofey]

I am so sorry I did not know of your loss..... Very entertaining and informative, nephew of mine! Great pictures, too! Miss you both!!!!

[Gail]

My Granny kept chickens and put an "egg" in most of her nests to encourage egg-laying. She said chickens were more likely to lay an egg if there was an egg already in the nest.

I remember one of these "eggs" was a golf ball; at least one was a rock - appropriately shaped, of course. Most were roughly carved of wood.

Could this explain the chickens laying eggs in the same nest?

[JoVE]

Great post. It resonates a lot with my own experience. I have seen my hens LINE UP to lay in the same nesting box. And sometimes there is an egg on the floor in a place that suggests she just couldn't hold it in while standing in line. Chicken logic, indeed.

[Mash]

Condolences to you on the loss of Mlle. Eggert.

Fabulous photos and so well written! Glad to have landed here. I've been dreaming of raising chickens for years and years. Your blog is the next best thing.
Looking forward to more posts and learning about chickens. Gosh, guess when the right moment comes along I'll be totally ready to accomodate these new feathery friends.

[duritz]

RIP Nicole. When one of my chickens "Excalibird" passed, there was an epic power grab for the position of head chicken. "Yolko Ono" won and remains head of the flock to this day!

[Zastai]

Great photos. By the way, another good way of using excess eggs is to make your own pasta - it's not nearly as hard as you might think and beats having omelettes 5 times a week.

[Rdrury]

Jeremy, I come to you by way of your brother. I enjoy your images and will be following your blog more often. I find that your "voice" reminds me a lot of Wil's and I have been following his blog for about 10 year or so. I look forward to more adventures of these chickens! :)

[The Noisy Plume]

PS You have a Jerry Seinfeld. I have a Debbie Gibson. Huh.

[The Noisy Plume]

AHHH HA HA HA!!!! Hilarious post! My friend just tweeted me a link to your blog, as I also keep hens on my property here in Idaho and am rather passionate about my chickie babes. I love my ladies very much and think they each have a fantastic personality. I lost my leghorn in the winter to a very zealous and very silly new baby German shorthaired pointer puppy...it was a sad affair...she was our best layer and a beautiful bird, to boot.

This is all to say, my hens have become my friends and I'm sorry you've lost one! I know how it feels!

[Amanda Brown]

I grew up on a farm and raised chickens for 4-H for several years. Pretty much everything you've said about them, is exactly how I always felt about my chickens. The weird thing is that they were essentially well-loved pets, with distinct personalities, whom I loved to watch and play with...but yet when it came time to eat them, I had no problem with dining on Miss Clucky Stew.

[adelheid]

Also, condolences on the loss of Nicole Eggert.

[adelheid]

The blog:
http://cynography.blogspot.com/

[adelheid]

Came via Wil's blog. My neighbor two doors down has chickens (in a suburb of Pittsburgh, PA no less) and he once handed me two handfuls of eggs he had just collected. (Our properties border at the back and I happened to be back in our yard at the same time he was. I know I had poached eggs for a few days after that. I now have another friend who sells eggs and I've purchased eggs from her. (We meet in a parking lot of a store where she goes when she's in town once a month. We laugh at what this must look like to anyone watching.) I will eat store bought eggs (cage free at least) but I really prefer fresh. Here's a link to her blog in case you are interested.

[edr777]

A great post and memorial! I hope this doesn't cause me to burn in hell (or somewhere close to it), but the blog of a certain TNG actor sent me here...oddly enough while I was sitting at my computer having a snack of boiled eggs and had no idea what the post was going to be about. Kind of like the Twilight Zone or something?

Hmm. Eggs are good. :)

[Enid Williams]

Great photos! I'm sorry for your loss. Fresh eggs really are delicious. I hear when the yolks are bright orange it means they've been eating extra beetles. Yummy.

PS: My palate thanks me when I eat them; my palette thanks me when I paint with them.

[Mary]

I just can't get over the fact that you named one of them "Jerry Seinfeld" - and the name is a perfect fit.

RIP, Nicole McChicken.

[Marie]

As someone's already pointed out, your brother was right. You are hillarious.

I'm really sorry to hear about Nicole. I know all about loosing a loved pet for a reason or another.
They all have their own personalities and are just amazing.

Now we're awaiting puppies around Mid Summer's Eve! Hopefully they will be little furry balls of joy as well :)